What’s up with French guys?
By Anonymous
So, can anyone help me with this? I don’t understand French guys at all!! No, seriously can someone help??
So I moved here a few months ago and I have obviously started dating. French guys can be sooo charming. Is this how they are normally? Like, all the time? Anyway, a certain Pierre that I met at a bar was particularly charming and invited me out for drinks. So we had drinks and I had a great time. But his text messages afterwards weren’t as fun… I mean, they were funny (the French have a hard time differentiating between fun and funny by the way) but the stuff he was saying sounded like he copied it off of a poetry for dummies book. Ok fineeee, I guess I’m just not used to that kind of treatment (I am from America after all). Except it has only been a week since we’ve been seeing each other and Pierre is sending me hearts and acting massively obsessed with me… is this normal behavior?? Am I supposed to be flattered here? Is he crazy or am I? I’m not sure whether to run for my life or take this gracefully. He’s definitely cute and interesting but I’m just not sure my gaze reminds him of a sunset on Sunday afternoon… Can someone with more experience help a sister out?
Love,
Concerned newbie
Lesson of politeness
By Sandra Nezzar
Only in Paris do you get terrible service simply for not saying bonjour! And only in Paris do you learn that you are not as friendly as you thought you were!
It started when I first moved to Paris, a few years ago. I come from a small town in Wisconsin, where people are usually overly nice. I think I am one of the nicest people ever haha and that’s not just my American side speaking. Apparently, though, we are not as nice as Parisians!! Or so I thought.
Anywho, my first job here was as fille-au-pair and I would use my limited budget to shop in order to fit in with the Parisian style.
And man, were the salespeople always SO RUDE!! I found it quite distressing any time I asked for a size or for help. I had no idea that Parisians could be so angry!
I finally asked a French friend why Parisians were so rude, especially at stores. And what she said blew my uncultured mind - the reason people were being so rude to me was because I wasn't saying “BONJOUR.” In fact, I was being rude, not them. By not saying ‘bonjour,’ I came off as pompous and pretentious, as though I thought these people didn't even deserve the common politesse of saying 'hello' – not at all the super friendly Midwestern American I thought I was!!
I then realized I had been saying “excuse-me” whenever I needed a different size or sometimes I would simply just ask for a different size without preceding it by anything. And then it hit me – in America, one of the countries where people are thought of as the most friendly (although sometimes fake, according to the French), people are not necessarily used to saying ‘hello’ before asking somebody to do something for them. But it should be a common courtesy to say ‘hello’ before asking somebody to do something for you… and only in Paris did I learn how to truly be polite!! From then on, I learned to say ‘bonjour’ all the time! And if you didn’t know this before, now you do!! BONJOUR BONJOUR BONJOUR!!!
